Look, I’ve survived a lot in my life. Born behind a Waffle House dumpster in the middle of a lightning storm. Raised by an emotionally unavailable uncle raccoon who “didn’t believe in birthdays.” Forced to earn my keep by stealing arcade tokens from unsuspecting teenagers. I thought I’d seen it all. But nothing—NOTHING—prepared me for this . They’re turning my beloved Dive Bar into a “Christmas Pop-Up Experience.”  Yes. Those exact words. Capitalized. Like they’re proud of it

Today started like any other: Woke up under the pinball machine at Dive Bar Mooresville. Stole half a slice of pizza from a patron who...

Let me set the scene. It was a Tuesday night, which, as all seasoned degenerates know, is when the truly weird stuff goes down. The bar...